Finally summer! Finally, more time to read…and most of what I’ve read this month has been good, I’d say.
Let’s begin, shall we?
GENERAL THOUGHTS:
Save for the first week of the month, May has been the first month where I’ve been able to relax somewhat! Finals were over and I’d moved out of my dorm before I knew it. Straight A’s and finally being free of my STEM requirements isn’t too shabby, I’d say! I’m so proud of what I’ve accomplished this year—and I’m so glad that I can have some downtime. And I’ve made good use of it so far—May has been my best month in terms of amount of books read (although the quality of…some of said books is another story), and I’ve definitely benefitted from the time spent reading! I’ve also been trying to focus more on art this summer, and consciously taking a slice out of each day to draw has been an adventure so far. I had a solid week where I had three or four blog posts all on the back burner simultaneously, so I unintentionally made a loose schedule for blogging every day as well, so I’m getting some writing in while I recover from writing two short stories and a 20,000 word novella all in one semester. I’ve also been pruning my Goodreads TBR…I’ve managed to cut it down from around 770 to around 720, so I’d say that’s been a success?
Other than that, I’ve just been cleaning things out of the dorm and bringing them back to my house, sleeping, watching Abbott Elementary (THEY FINALLY DID IT!!! THEY FINALLY LET THEM KISS!!!), Taskmaster, and Hacks (we love Jean Smart in this house), and relishing in the warm weather and the beginning of summer. I feel like every time I’m in the car with my family, I just pass the hills and feel the need to comment on how much I love that shade of green that summertime brings. But it’s so beautiful. Every single time. It never gets old. Thank you, shades of summer green.
READING AND BLOGGING:
I read 19 books this month! I’ve been oscillating between both ends of the spectrum this month, for sure—I read one of the worst books I’ve read this year, but also two of the very best. Somehow, it’s pretty evenly split as far as ratings go when I’ve lined them all up that way, but it’s been up and down all month, but on a track towards betterment midway through. I focused on AAPI books for May, and I found some fantastic books as a result from both familiar and new-to-me authors!
Happy Sunday, bibliophiles! I hope this week has treated you well.
This week: in addition to my blue and black/white/gray periods, it’s become increasingly obvious that I also have a green period. On another note, food processors are great!
The restraint I displayed by not blowing through Blur’s entire discography back in the last half of 2021 is restraint that I have yet to parallel, so it’s only now, almost three years after the initial Blur Breakdown, that I’ve gotten around to Modern Life is Rubbish (if there was ever a more British title). I did sort of sully it with the experience of listening to it while crawling under my bed while trying to exorcise the last of the dust bunnies from my dorm (and getting caught on the rain), but that’s all me—this is the first Blur album where they started to feel like themselves.
I’d never thought of Modern Life is Rubbish, Parklife, and The Great Escape (the final Blur album to surmount) as a trilogy until Trash Theory described it as such—from my understanding, this is what cemented their reputation as the foremost clever spectators of British life in the ’90s, peering out of every windowsill with a snappy remark about the passersby. Modern Life feels like Parklife just before it morphed into the masterpiece it would later be—all of the pieces were there, and all that was needed was to make it larger than life. The melted shoegaze of Leisure was hanging on by a thread (it’s much more evident in the special edition—see: “Peach”), and they’d shifted from staring off into the distance, bleary-eyed and exhausted, into taking out that exhaustion on whatever they saw fit. Straight off of the heels of the triumphant “For Tomorrow,” “Advert” opens with a soundbite from the commercial you’ve just heard (“Food processors are great!”) before launching into what feels like the genesis of Graham Coxon’s signature assault of pounding guitars that practically demand every crowd to jump up and down. This relentless guitar work feels like witnessing the larval stage of “Jubilee,” crashing and bouncing with unending abandon. And this kind of guitar that threatens to consume the track is perfect for the endless consumerism that “Advert” comments on—commercials everywhere, a flood of inescapable offers leeching off of the dissatisfaction of the ordinary man: “You need a holiday somewhere in the sun/With all the people who are waiting/There never seems to be one.” This consumerism leads to even more dissatisfaction, which leads to more consumerism to quell said dissatisfaction, which leads to…ah, capitalism. What could possibly go wrong?
LUSH, Mitski’s first album, was made for an end-of-year project when she was a junior in college; there’s an unverifiable TikTok rumor going around that she got a C on it, which, given the traction of the Mitski fandom, is just going to become an urban legend at this point. So it goes.
Either way, it’s both remarkable and understandable that she wrote all of these songs and had them produced while she was still in college. Remarkable, because just from “Abbey,” she clearly had the nascent talent for wringing emotion out like ice-cold water from a towel from a young age, and understandable, because sometimes being alone and sleepless in your dorm on the very first night of college brings out that flood of inner darkness. Leave it to TikTok to leave out the best part of the song for whatever trend it latched itself to; the slow, chanting a cappella that gained traction feels like a prayer to a void growing within your chest, a litany of acknowledgment to that which you want to reach, but cannot touch. As an instrument, Mitski’s voice, unaccompanied until halfway through the song, is a haunting, flitting machine, the slow peak and valley of a heart monitor. But once the digitized drums sweep through, it feels as though the sky has opened up. This prayer has transformed from a whisper into the confession box into a plea bellowed to the heavens. “Abbey” chronicles a search for the soul, a ravenous hunger that cannot be sated that lies just out of reach: “There is a light, I feel it in me/But only, it seems, when the dark surrounds me/There is a dream and it sleeps in me/To awake in the night, crying, ‘Set me free’/And I awake every night, crying, ‘Set me free.'” Hoowheee. God. Makes me want to travel back in time just to give her a hug, but it seems like she’s now far removed from that time in her life, emotionally: she described the version of herself that wrote the album as being “long gone,” so I can only hope that she’s been able to fill her heart, as much as the music industry has kept her from doing so.
AMAMA, which came out on the 17th, wasn’t at the top of my most anticipated albums of the year, but after only one listen, it’s cemented itself as one of the most exciting ones so far. It’s a side of Crumb that hasn’t been let loose until now, one that, instead of gently dribbling like age-old water from the precipice of a glacier, skitters around on the smallest legs, darting this way and that like a frightened millipede. The whole album feels like watching a bunch of beetles hopped up on sugar water run a race: their iridescent shells catch the light as they crawl about, scaling walls instead of the tiny racetrack and occasionally clambering over each other to get ahead. No wonder they named a whole song “The Bug”—I need the instrumentals of AMAMA just so that somebody can use them for a documentary about insects.
AMAMA‘s three openers—“From Outside A Window Sill,” this song, and “The Bug”—are its strongest links, and although the album never falters, these three shine the brightest. “Side By Side” ricochets with an energy that I never would have expected from the likes of Crumb; both the drum machine and the actual drummer are working overtime to create a scampering beat that frantically bounces like a honeybee trapped under a plastic cup. It’s a song that yearns to go, go, go, and go it does—the swirl of rapid-fire synth beats are unpredictable in their flight path, so much so that I feel a jittery, sugary rush just listening to it. For me, the most fascinating part of this change in speed for Crumb is how easily Lila Ramani’s voice adapts to the change; it’s not like I thought she couldn’t sing more quickly, but her voice only slightly seemed to change speed along with the music. Her voice is permanently trapped in a slurry of amber, unaffected by time or space—I feel like her vocals, no matter the speed, would mesh with any tempo. It retains that syrupy calm that made the rest of Crumb’s catalogue so soothing and laid-back—a quality that feels suspended in a space beyond time.
It took me how long to find out that Andrew Bird had recorded a song with St. Vincent? I’m surprised that 12-year-old me didn’t find this drifting around somewhere, but to be fair, St. Vincent’s name isn’t listed on the official track.
In 2024, Andrew Bird and St. Vincent do seem like an odd couple; since 2012, Clark’s style has morphed so many times that it’s difficult to imagine her stylistically even going near Bird’s songbird-whistling, violin-dominated alternative folk. It makes sense that this was probably recorded sometime in 2011—post-Strange Mercy, but before the last dregs of Actor and Marry Me were out of her system. She’s still never been fully folk, but the intersection of the Venn diagram of her early style and Bird’s is wider than I thought it would be. With her guitar playing mostly absent, what shines in “Lusitania” is her voice; you can tell in the first half that she’s been quieted in post-production or that she’s holding back on completely dominating the track. “Lusitania” makes me miss those artsier sensibilities of 2008-2010 St. Vincent, the delicate turns of phrase and the more feathery clarion calls her voice twisted into. Just like that, I’ve got another song in my hypothetical playlist of songs where artists sing certain phrases in a way that scratches all the itches in my brain: in this case, her singing of “there’s no shame” at 2:44. Her warble seems to chain-link with Bird’s in a way that produces its own chord, something more than a harmony that feels like a tuning fork struck at my heart.
But why don’t I talk about Andrew Bird, though, since…y’know, he’s the one who made the bulk of this song, anyway? Totally unlike me to go on about St. Vincent…completely uncharacteristic. (I have not changed a bit since middle school.) The instrumentation doesn’t stand out to me on this one as much, save for the rising cymbals that nearly swallow both Bird and Clark’s voices. But it’s clearly to make way for the lyrics—a clever string of World War I metaphors, presumably about a relationship where one party suffers volley after volley of abuse, while the other doesn’t even think to recognize that their behavior is harmful: “If your loose and libel lips/Keep sinking all my ships/Then you’re the one who sank my Lusitania/But somehow it don’t register as pain at all.” As far as ship metaphors go, the Titanic has likely been used one too many times, but the Lusitania feels especially potent on several fronts. The use of such a large passenger ship (and its sinking) drives home the metaphor of weathering emotional abuse until it drowns you. What’s more effective still about the Lusitania was its eventual role in the First World War; since a significant number of its passengers were Americans, the sinking of the Lusitania by a German U-Boat was part of what pushed public opinion towards entering the war on the side of the British in 1917. Just like the boiling public outrage of the American public, the Lusitania was the straw that broke the camel’s back, an event so explosive that there could be no other option than to break away, no matter how many casualties it cost. “You laid mines along the shore” feels like the last gasp of this deeply harmful relationship, the claws that scored scars down the narrators back as they squirmed free of their bloodied grasp.
I really should have seen this collaboration coming, not because of my middle school obsession, but also because it slipped my mind that it wasn’t the first time. Here they are in 2009 performing “What Me Worry?” (15:51) and “Black Rainbow” (21:09).
…AND A BOOK TO GO WITH IT:
Fireheart Tiger – Aliette De Bodard – “If your loose and libel lips/Keep sinking all my ships/Then you’re the one who sank my Lusitania/But somehow it don’t register as pain at all…”
How I’ve never covered Spiritualized on Sunday Songs is genuinely beyond me. I did sort of discuss them when I talked about “Monster Love” last June, but that was more of a remix than anything. They’ve been in my top 5 artists of all time for at least 4 years now, but I suppose I blew through most of their catalogue before I started writing these posts. Mark my words, “Ladies And Gentlemen We Are Floating in Space” is always on in the background of everything else I’m listening to.
Everything Was Beautiful, which came out around two years ago, was some of J. Spaceman’s best work to date; at the time it came out, I remember describing it as Ladies And Gentlemen We Are Floating in Space but happy. Insane concept, I know…when was the last time you saw J. Spaceman and happiness in the same room together? Hardly ever, up until maybe 2017, right? Jesus. This poor man has to be the dictionary definition of “going through it.” Which is why the “happy Ladies And Gentlemen” hit me so deeply—all of the heroin, heartbreak, and near-death experiences have begun to fade away from his newer music, but the explosive, immersive creativity remains the same—you can really tell that these positive changes in his life have really begun to take root. And I am so glad. This man has been on the brink of death not once but twice. He doesn’t just deserve it: he needs it.
Like Ladies And Gentlemen, Everything Was Beautiful is always at the back of my mind, usually in the form of the uproariously celebratory “Always Together With You” and the nearly 10-minute long, haunting and cinematic closer “I’m Coming Home Again.” “The Mainline Song” lands on the side of euphoria, and thank god that it’s not heroin-induced this time (as much as “She Kissed Me (It Felt Like a Hit)” slaps). J. Spaceman’s immeasurable talent lies in how quickly he can not just create an atmosphere, but how he can create one that consumes so instantly. It’s not a building wave that darkens you with shadows before swallowing you whole: a more apt comparison would be falling into the core of a star, instant immersion with stardust sounds and white-hot flares roaring all around you. Every song is a universe contained in a spare amount of minutes. However, even if I did cast aside the part about there not being a build before the immersion, the buildup to “The Mainline Song” may just be its main draw. The build itself is part of the universe; J. Spaceman doesn’t even start singing until the halfway point, letting the song construct itself from fragments of stardust and train tracks as it swirls into being. It’s a song patched from the breeze of night, the kind you only find when sticking your head out of a car window, breathless and ecstatic. It’s a sprint through the streets as city lights blink like so many stars. It’s the wind parting your hair as you run to catch the bus, panting as you stumble inside with a fit of laughter. As many songs as there are about this kind of adventuring, none of them quite capture the hopeful feeling of “The Mainline Song.” No feeling necessitates J. Spaceman’s magical universe creation more—the swirl of horns, choir, and machinery bottle the feeling in all of its rapid euphoria, as blurry as the world passing by from the window of a train. Like nothing else, “The Mainline Song” captures the look you share with your friend as you reach a silent agreement to leave everything else and run. The destination isn’t what matters: it’s the breathless thrill of love.
A small but vibrant joy of life: songs coming back to you when you least expect them to. Not long ago, I just had a fleeting memory of the chorus, and so I went back through Passenger to try and find the exact song (because I was not about to google “Lisa Hannigan song that goes oh oh oh oh eh eh ah ah ah eh eh”). Luckily, it didn’t take much digging, and now I have this parcel of dancing happiness.
One of the top YouTube comments on the music video for “What’ll I Do” calls this song “the happiest sad song ever,” and there’s really no other way to describe it. Lisa Hannigan does have a penchant for belting out her melancholy, but this one somehow feels happy, even though it’s about a breakup; the lyrics are like watching an slapstick comedy where miserable event after comically miserable event starts crashing down on the protagonist (“What’ll I do now that you’re gone?/My boat won’t row, my bus doesn’t come/And I have the fingers, you’ve got the thumb”), but somehow, they’re smiling through the pain, and clicking their heels for the heck of it. “What’ll I Do” sits squarely at the point where so many bad things have happened to you that you just have to laugh—there’s no use in being miserable anymore, so why not just have a laugh at yourself and do a silly little dance? And Hannigan has juiced that emotion out in barrels, making this circus of bad luck into a full-on show, a folksy singalong that’s begging for a line of cheerful dancers. I wouldn’t complain about that for the music video, but the one that we do have is hilariously fitting as well—seemingly filmed from a phone, the whole video is Hannigan singing the song while on a rollercoaster; the camera shakes incessantly, and she has to break the lip sync at least twice just so she can grab her hat before it flies away. (I get it. We’ve all been there. Currently thinking about this Hello Kitty baseball cap that fell off while I went to Legoland that one time. I never forgot about you…) Like the lyrics, it’s a rollercoaster that’s already dragged you around and thrown you up in the air, making you want to puke, but there’s nothing left to do but have a laugh until the ordeal is over.
Crumb? Making somewhat uptempo music? It’s more likely than you think.
…I actually mean that seriously, for once. Other than a handful of songs off of their last album, Ice Melt, Crumb has been known for their calm—gentle, electronic dream-pop melodies that drifted along like the bubbles in a can of soda, and tasted of that same sweetness. At least, that’s how I think of their music—in the past few years, they’ve been the band that my mom puts on when she needs to focus on her (incredible!) art, or just do some cleaning—any task that necessitates some calming of the brain. Crumb have recently announced the release of their third album, AMAMA, which is set to release just over a month from now (!!)—May 17. I initially missed “Dust Bunny” when it was released as a single last year, but now that I’ve listened to it alongside “AMAMA” and “Crushxd,” it seems like some sort of shift is on the way for the band…even if it is just the tempo. “Dust Bunny” has picked up the pace, letting the drums take the wheel as the frantic energy blossoms from the (always plentiful) synths. As evidenced by the underwater-sounding effects on both the instrumentation and Lila Ramani’s voice, they’ve never lost that wooziness that coated their earlier songs like syrup (see “Locket”), but the molasses has melted enough to allow for their constant wiggling to speed up. The lyrics, too, feel like a far cry from “I don’t have class/Got a lot of time on my hands/To sit, wait around…”; just as with the music, Ramani recalls a vignette of panic and guilt: “You’re seeing a ghost/Can’t undo what’s been done/Forever no more/Stacks of clothing fill your room, you/Can’t find one thing to return.” Despite the spaciness of the synths, there’s no doubt that it’s morphed from danceable upbeat to the kind of upbeat that’s only so because it soundtracks the search for your sprinting around the house to try and find your keys 5 minutes after you were supposed to leave for work; or, if we’re sticking to the metaphor, trying to get that one dust bunnyout of your dorm before your RA comes to do a room inspection so that they don’t think you’ve been living in a pigsty this whole time. But that panic never overwhelms the music—being so cloaked in color-changing mist and melting shapes as it is, it’s still the same ol’ Crumb deep down.
…AND A BOOK TO GO WITH IT:
And Other Mistakes – Erika Turner – reconciling with the weight of your past actions and other people’s perceptions takes center stage in this novel.
Yet another infectious earworm that I have my dad to thank for, and also, I can definitively say that I’ve found it: my favorite band name. I mean, come on. Pop Will Eat Itself? How true is that? And doesn’t it just sound so cool as a name?
If you’re expecting their songs to be a meditation on the nature of pop, as their band name is, I’m not entirely sure if you’d be satisfied. Granted, I’ve only heard two of their songs (including this one—check out “X, Y, & Zee” for more), and neither of them concern their lyrics with such things. What they’ve got is something far superior: four and a half minutes of listing off comics, movies, TV shows, and bands that they like—sorry, dig. And it’s a blast. Aside from the fact that I never anticipated Alan Moore ever being directly referenced in a song, it’s just a catchy, synthy, fandom-fest—I’m surprised that this hasn’t been accepted as some kind of comic con anthem. Plus, there’s the enhancement of the music video, in all of its terrible ’80s CGI glory—lots of old TV sets floating around in the ether and the band members superimposed over panels from Watchmen and The Killing Joke. It’s the nerdiest club banger I’ve ever heard. What else is there to say? It slaps. Glad we can formally acknowledge that Alan Moore knows the score.
…AND A BOOK TO GO WITH IT:
…well, pretty much anything that they mention in this song: The song is basically a reading list in and of itself, so…
And that’s another Bowie album for the books! As…incapacitated as he was during that period, Young Americans feels like the first album of proof of how easily it came to Bowie to slither in and out of genres as easily as most people stroll through an open door. It oozes with slickness—somewhere in my mental periphery, this album exists solely in a smoky nightclub as midnight ticks by, clammy with warmth and blasting with saxophones. Personally, sometimes the sax went on a little too long for my liking (see “Win”), but for the most part, Bowie knew exactly how much to smear about—and make it sound deliciously raw and sultry.
But sultry isn’t all that the album boasts—Bowie always has something clever and meditative up his sleeve. Fresh off of Diamond Dogs, which was full of the proposed contents for a musical version of George Orwell’s 1984 which he never got to make, Bowie had Big Brother on the brain; the kind of theatricality that what I’ve listened to of Diamond Dogs suits a musical well, but as he turned his genre gaze to soul, it almost feels like he had that sultry quality in mind and turned it into deliberate deception. The subject of “Somebody Up There Likes Me” is the sleaziest of the sleazy—a politician who seems to float amongst his subjects without any fear of retribution: “He’s everybody’s token, on everybody’s wall/Blessing all the papers, thanking one and all/Hugging all the babies, kissing all the ladies/Knowing all that you think about from writing on the wall.” As the saxophone howls, Bowie’s fictional figure struts through the street, stopping once in a while to sweep a woman up into his arms and plant a kiss on her cheek. But every act of generosity is an empty one—this is someone grooming the public along with his own image, putting on a show of authenticity just to get them to cough up the spare change from their pockets. Bowie sums it up in the bridge: “Was a way when we were young, that/Any man was judged by what he’d done, but/Now you’ve pick them on the screen (What they look like).” Fresh off the heels of Nixon, I’m sure this was already closer to the political climate than most people wanted to admit, but I can’t help but think of how this has only been exacerbated—and not just in the 21st century. We got Reagan only a handful of years after Young Americans was released (there’s a “savage son of the TV tube” for you), and the cycle has only repeated itself in the years since. But for me, the genius in this song isn’t necessarily about the message, timely as it continues to be; this song could have been put in any of his albums, but having it on Young Americans makes the sleaze glow like neon. Setting this politician against the backdrop of a distinctly American sound, something that comes off so howling and genuine, encapsulates that political climate disturbingly well—a façade of a clean-cut, American man of the people with charm and sex appeal, but with all manner of evils stowed just out of reach of the cameras. The soundscape of Young Americans begs for some kind of old Hollywood love story, and Bowie knew it—and he took that atmosphere to its most perverse extreme just to make it ring true.
The Bookish Mutant 